Tree Hugger Romance

What if a tree hugger developed a romantic relationship with a tree? What if the relationship developed problems? Here is the rest of the story:

I came home last night and my girlfriend the apple tree was crying. There were blossoms all over the place.

“What’s wrong?” I axed.

She braced herself and said, “I don’t know how to tell you this, and I wasn’t thinking of branching out, but I’ve met someone else”.

“What went wrong?” I axed. “I thought we wood grow old together. I thought we had good chemistry. I would exhale carbon dioxide which you absorbed and you released oxygen which I inhaled. It was a perfect system. Who is it?”

“I’ve developed a budding relationship with the walnut tree in the park”.

“I thought I ‘saw’ you looking at him”, I whimpered.

“He said he’s nuts about me and that I’m the apple of his eye. I don’t know if it will work out, but, to be fair, I think I should leaf you as soon as possible.”

“Years ago he was poplar but he turned out to be a shady character and I think you’re barking up the wrong tree”, I told her angrily. “That walnut tree was a member of a splinter faction and hung out with some squirrelly characters! You are just infatuated with his pet dogwood tree”.

“That may or may knot be true”, she responded, “but I’m planning to go tonight so I don’t leaf you in limbo.”

I relented and said, “Maple it’s the best thing for you. I wooden want you to miss and opportunity for tree love. I won’t cut you down for your dream of happiness. It’s oak-a with me. I won’t pine for you. Make like a tree and leave before I change my mind”.

I thought she had bats in her belfry, but maple it was just the noise from all the hummingbird nests on her limbs. She rooted through her belongings and packed them in her trunk. The last time I saw her she was going down Peachtree Street weeping like a willow.


Copyright 2009
eMeRaLD Effect Enterprises