Tales of the Coyote State Forest

The Coyote State Forest swimming pool had large horseflies last summer. Once I was swimming and two giant horseflies grabbed me by the hair, pulled me out of the water and dropped me on the pool deck. Then a housefly landed on me!

The Coyote State Forest swimming pool has a large amount of chlorine in it. One day a black snake fell into the pool. By the time it swam out on the other side it had turned solid white. Another day a black bear did a cannonball off the diving board. Out of the corner of my eye I saw it jump and I heard the thud when it hit bottom. By the time it came up for air it had become a polar bear.

The water in the Coyote State Forest swimming pool is very cold. One day a rattlesnake fell into the pool. By the time the lifeguard saved the rattlesnake it was so cold it was shaking badly. With the rattle at one end and the chattering teeth at the other end it sounded like a percussion band.

Once day a fellow caught a fish at the Forest pond. The strange thing was that he caught it by the tail. He said it was swimming backward to keep the water out of its eyes.

The maintenance crew at the Coyote State Forest is amazingly skilled with heavy equipment. They are able to place large boulders on the tops of mountains to create very attractive scenic overlooks. Their landscaping skills make it seem as if the rock formations have been there for millions of years.

The rangers have a busy time each spring when the black bears return from Florida. The line at the southern entrance to the Forest can be quite long and some of the bears become unruly as they wait impatiently. They can become quite testy about government regulations especially regarding their right to carry weapons.

The rangers are often occupied through the summer months with bear complaints as they come into the office. Commonly bears complain about rude campers, dirty restrooms and overly tight trash can lids. They also dislike poison ivy and briers on the trails and they seem unusually upset about poorly marked trails.

There is a large overabundance of coyotes in the Coyote State Forest. The rangers captured many of the coyotes and trained them to race while chasing a mechanical rabbit around a track. Forest visitors bet on which coyote will win the races. Lucrative revenues from coyote track gambling have enabled the Forest to operate with a large cash surplus.

If I’m lyin’, I’m dyin’.


Copyright January 29, 2011
eMeRaLD Effect Enterprises